The John Burrison Georgia Folklore Archive recordings contains unedited versions of all interviews. Some material may contain descriptions of violence, offensive language, or negative stereotypes reflecting the culture or language of a particular period or place. There are instances of racist language and description, particularly in regards to African Americans. These items are presented as part of the historical record. This project is a repository for the stories, accounts, and memories of those who chose to share their experiences for educational purposes. The viewpoints expressed in this project do not necessarily represent the viewpoints of the Atlanta History Center or any of its officers, agents, employees, or volunteers. The Atlanta History Center makes no warranty as to the accuracy or completeness of any information contained in the interviews and expressly disclaims any liability therefore. If you believe you are the copyright holder of any of the content published in this collection and do not want it publicly available, please contact the Kenan Research Center at the Atlanta History Center at 404-814-4040 or reference@atlantahistorycenter.com.  In this recording Rod McEwen interviews his father R.A. McEwen and his brother Alan McEwen as well as John Georgius and Lynn McEwen. The interview begins with John Georgius and Rod McEwen telling a series of jokes, including one about a bartender who tried to rip off a gorilla that visited his bar; a few about Poles, and one about Alabama football players lack of intelligence. Rod McEwen recalls a story about Americans who tried to deport communists, then one about counterfeiters who printed and successfully used $15 bills. Georgius tells another series of jokes, including a few name puns and a few about confession and Catholic priests and their efforts at conversion. Next, Lynn McEwen shares a few jokes, including one about a group of boys that tried to determine the greatest man in the world and one about a knight who killed a dragon. The group continues to alternate telling jokes, common themes include priests, golfing, fishing, and the old west. They tell one about a golfing priest that kept missing the ball, one about a family that encountered Indians in the old west, one about a Confederate soldier who trapped a group of Union soldiers during the Civil War, and one about a man who tried to confess his sins but couldnt be absolved because he wouldnt reveal the name of the woman he committed adultery with, among a few other stories.  John Georgius (1946-?) was born in Baltimore, Maryland. After living in Long Beach, California for a short time, he moved to Atlanta in 1948 and graduated from Druid Hills High School. He worked at Fulton National Bank during his senior year of college at Georgia State Univeristy. In 1963, he married Jacqueline Georgius, and the two divorced in April of 1987. He married Genevieve Henriette Mary Jane DeChamps in July the same year and they later divorced in 1998. R.A. McEwen (1910-1988) was born in Calgary, Alberta, Canada and graduated from the University of Alberta Dental School in 1939. He later worked as an Assistant Professor at the University of Alberta and established a dental practice there. In 1950, he moved to Atlanta and became the chairman of the fixed prosthetic department of the School of Dentistry at Emory Dentistry. He worked there until 1955, when he opened up a private practice in Atlanta, then retired in 1977. He invented the high speed dental drill. He married Lois Keillor McEwen and they had five children: Lynn DeCosta, Heather Gray, Grace Tuttle, Rod McEwen (1944-?), and Alan McEwen(1953-?). Rod McEwen (1944-?) was born in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada and moved to Atlanta with his family in 1951. He graduated from Druid Hills High School in 1961 and worked as a stock broker trainee with Courts and Company. Alan Frederick McEwen (1953-?) and Lynn McEween (1910-?) were born in Atlanta and graduated from Briarcliff High School.  Native Americans  1. into You heard about the joke concerning the Gorilla that walked the bar onlt ,~, sat down and ordered a drink. The bartender sat there a minute, went over and fixed the drink and brought it to him and the Gorilla gave him a ten dollar bill. The bartender started thinking to himself, "Lord, this Gorilla sure doesn't know anything, so I'll just give him' a dollar change." And he gave him a dollar change and put the nine dollars in his pocket. So the bartender went back over and started cleaning the bar and everything and he started thinking about this Gorilla a little more and he decided he'd strike up a conversation with him and he went over to the Gorilla and he said, "You know, we don't have very many Gorillas in this place. This is the first time in a long time that I can remember one ever coming in here:' And the Gorilla looked back at him with a real stern look and said, "Hell, I guess not, for nine dollars a drink." 2. You know wlla t the shortest title of a ---- You know what the shortest book in history is? Italian War Heroes. 3. a Did yOLl hear who won the Polack beauty contest? Nobody. 3. b Do you know why the Po lacks are afraid to go swimming in Lake }!ichigan? They're afraid they'd leave rings. -2- 3. c What is it when a bunch of Poles go wandering around with their hands up in the air? Tha t's the Polish Army on war rna neuvers. 3. d What is the fore finger of ilie left -- left hand with initials written on the finger used forl !fell that's a,uh, Polish monogrammed handkerchief. Traditionally, the Alabama football players have been note for being, uh, the height of stupidity. One day in a Psychology class the professor called on one of his football players at Alabama and asked him what he thought about LSD. The football p~yer replied, "Well, I think we'll take 'em by two touchdowns." Some time ago t here was a good deal of trou ble in the United States with communists. They were coming over here trying to infiltrate the government. Uh, the FBI finally rounded up most of these trouble makers and sent them, or were going to send them back to t hei r na tive cou n try. They were looking around for a ship to send them back on and finall,V wound up, uh, with an English ship. The English ship said they would take these people back, so they loaded all these communists on this ship and they took off for )Ioscow. -3- They'd been out at sea for three or four days and, uh, One---one morDi~ the first mate walked up to the second mate and he says, "Ay matey, one of those commies died last night. lioo ld you 'ave 'im buried at sea before noon ple,ase? Cabin tlfen ty thr e e. " The second mate says, "All right suh, will do." So about noon the first mate met the second mate on deck and he says, "'Matey" he says, "Did you take care of the commie that diedf Cabin twenty three you know." The second mate says, "Egad, I thought you said cabin thirty three." . The first ma te said, "No but was 'e dead too?" The second mate said, "No 'e said 'e ,,-asntt, but you know what liahs those blightuhs ah." 6. A cwple of counterfeiters went out one night and got absolutely bombed and they decided they'd go up to their PJ,'JJk m(\ney making room and make some moneywhilethey were feeling so good. So they went up there and printed up a few thousand dollars. Next morning they came back, wandered into the room an d the one coun terfei ter just went ecsta tic. He thought it was tremendous. He dashed over and says,"Good grief look at the money we've madel Hey, this stuff is tremendous." The other ~uy says, " Are you kidding?" He says, "This is a miserable job. We can't possibly use this stuff." First guy says, "Whadda you mean, this is tremendous stuff. Look at this tremendous engraving. ,Oh, this stuff is great. W'e can pass this like nothing." He says, "We can't use that stuff." The firs t guy says, "Why not?" -4- He says, "Well, they're fifte-en dolla r bills." He says, "Don~ let that bother ya, that's no trouble at all. " So he says, "Whadda you mean?" He says, "He can't possibly use this stuff." "Oh yeah we can. Gimme one chance." He says, "Whadd a you, crazy?" "No, not at all. We can use this stuff." He says, "I tell you what, I'll give you one chance." So they hop in t he car and went down to the, uh, local candy store. And ,the counterfeiter who was not in favor of all tMs told his buddy, says, "Itll give you one minute. If you're not out of there in one minute I'm leaving. This is the craziest idea I ever heard of." So this fellow walked into the store. About a minute later he walked out, got in the car and they drove off. Fellow driving says, "Noli you -don't mean to tell me you re ally passed tha t stuff do you?" And the guy says, "Yeah, there's nothing to it." Says, "How'd you do it?" says, "WeIll wandered in there, ord ..!'ed, uh, 65 cents worth of candy, the lady gave me the candy and change and I walked out and here I am." He says, "What'd you get in the The guy says, "Two seven dollar cent piece." way of chan g e -?" GJ bi 11s and a thirty-five -5- 7. Paper boy came into the off ice the other day and I asked him what his name was and he said, "My names Poe." And I says, "You any kin to Edgar Allan Poe." And he said, "I is Edgar Allan Po'." - 8. We got a new pap er boy the other day. He came in and I asked him what his name was and he said, "Hy name's Patrick Henry. " I said, "Well, that's a real well known name." And he says, "It oughta' be, I been de1iverin' papers around here for 25 years." 9. Two local college teams were playing for the championship of the area and one of the teams ,~as behind by seven points and there was about thirty-five seconds left in the game and the team that was losing had the ball but their quarterback was b\1rt on the previous play. And the On 1y other quarter- back they had was this real dumb fel1a that wes just the second string man and the coach was hesitant to put him in so he went over and talked to the boy and he said, "I want you to go in there, but," he said, "don't call number thirteen," he said, " call any other play," but he said, "we've called number thirteen all night, it's never gone and it never will go," so he said, "Gall anything, do anything you want to do, but stay away from play number thirteen." So, the substitute quarterback went in and on the very first play he called a thirteen. The halfback went right -6- through the tackle--hole in the tackle, ran down cut through the rest of the secondary a~d all went, all the way down for a" touchdown and they won the game. Everybody ran off the fi eld and the coach was mad, however, he was glad he won the game but he was real mad at the quarter- back for calling the play, so he went over ahd he grabbed him by the arm and and he said,"Look bUddy," he said, uh, "I told you not to call play number thirteen." And he said, "Ii'hy'd you do i1ti" So the dumb quarterback 100kedat him and said, "Well coach, I went oh a hunch. I looked over at the left half- back and his number was seven. I looked over at the right halfback and his number was eight. Seven and eig ht is thirteen and so I knew it would go." / And the coach said, "lIell, buddy, seven and eight's not th irteen. Seven and eight's fif teen." And the quar terback looked at him and said, "Ya know coach if I was as smart as you we'd a' lost that game. 10. One day, about Tuesday, these three little boys, one Jewish, one Italian, and one colored were standing on the uh, corner and uh, they were just playin' around and this Irishman came up, real Irish ya know and he says, "I wonder who the brightest bo,Y is here"and uh they say;'I don't know," you know. And so the Irishman says, "I'll give you five dollars to whoever says the greatest man who ever:1ived." And so the little uh, colored bOy says, "Abraham Lincoln." And the man says, the Irishman says, uh, "That was a r.R -7- man, but not .:the greatest that ever lived." And SO the little Italian boy said, "Julius Caesar." And fue man said, "That was a great man, but not the grea test that ever lived. And uh, the little uh, Jewish boy says, "Uh, lemme' think for a while. Uh. Uh. Saint Patrick." And so the man said, "You're right. You win five dollars." And so while the Irish man was walking down fue stre.et the little colored and Italian boys said to fue Jewish boy, "How'd you know Saint Patrick was the greatest man who ever lived?" And so the little Jewish boy said, "liell, I was thinking about Moses, but business is business." 11. There wa s this kingdom and there was thi shorrib Ie , horrible dragon. And the king didn't know what to do about it so he called all his knights and he says, "You kill this dragon and I'll let you.have the choice of my three daughters." So he says, "Oh bOY, I'm gonna go out and kill that dragon. tt So he goes ou t and kills the dragon and comes back and says, "King, I've killed the dragon." So the king says, "Okay, you have a choice of my three daugh ters." So the first daughter comes out and she is completely dressed you know. And the next one comes out and she has on a bra and underwear. And the next one comes out and she doesn't have a stitch of clothes on, not one stitch. So which one do you think he picked? The king. It >las a fairy tale. -8- 12. This is a story about two men who were out on a duck hun t. And on e was a whiskey drinker and the ot her di dn' t drink at all. He just ate crackers. And they got out there about four o'clock in the morning, got into the blind to watch for the ducks; The whiskey man started to drink his whisk3Y and the cracker man just sat there and ate his crackers. And they sat there all da~' long, the whiskey man drinking his Whiskey and the cracker man eating his crackers until about four o'clock in the afternoon and they hadn't seen a duck all day. They were just getting ready to go home when all of a sudden they saw this lone duck coming over. The Whiskey man jumped up and grabbed his rifle and shot and down came the duck . And the cracker man said, "That's just amazing," says "You've been sitting he~four o'clock in the morning and you jumped up and brought that duck down." The "hiskey man says, "Well, that is~!)t an~'thing. Usually I get ten or twelve out of a flock that big." 13. This is a story ahout the old west. And the people l(ere era ssing the c oun try in wagon tra ins. And th i s man and his family were out crossing Kansas and they got caught by a band of Indians. And this man and his wife and four children got caught by the Indians. And the poor children were killed and the l"88;:' wife "as killed and the man was tied up to a tree. And they just shot him full of arrows. It was the middle of summer and it was hot. And they just left him there. So here he was tied up to this tree. And the flies and the heat were just terrible and the poor man hanging in these ropes. And the next day another wagon came by and found this /73.. -9- man and he was still conscious. And they saw this awful si tua ti on. This poor man hanging in the se ropes, flies all over these bleeding areas in his tiody. And they said, "Gosh, that's awful. Doesn't it hurt?" He said, "No, only when I laugh." 14  Well this story is real uh, out in the west a long time ago. And it was during the drouth season and uh, there was no rain and nothing was doing anything. I mean no crops were growing or anything. And there was this Indian tribe that was just starved to death you know. They didn't have any food. And the Indian chief you know, he gets up in front of all these people and said, "Tonight we have a council meeting. Everybody come. I g at one bad thing and one good th ing." And so that night all these Indian people came to the council meeting and the chief gets up and says, "The bad thing is tha t we haven't any food. And all we have is Buffalo manure to eat." And so all the Indian people say, "What's the good thing? What's . < the good thing." And the chief says, "We got plenty of it." 15. During lvorld War 11 there were these Germans on one hill. They were called Krauts. And the colored people on the--on the other hill called the Willies. And so the Krauts were sitting there all ready and they hear this noise and says, "Hey Willie! Is that you?" -10- (In Negro dialect) "Yeah man, that's me." (Bang. Bang~ Shoots Willie) So Willie' was' really messed up,. I mean bad. So he went to, thi s hospital and was talkir,g and says, "Man, I'm so mad what those Krauts do to me I's going to get 'em back." So in another we'ek' he's back on the hill. So he's sitting there and hears a noise and say~, "Hei Kraut! That you?" He says, "Yeah Willie, that you?" "Yeah man, that's,cme." (Bang. Bang. Shoots Willie again.) 16. This is a golf story. It happened in Las Vegas. This chap "lent out there for a meeting .and he finished the meeting early. Everybody else had gone home and he was staying over for a couple of days because he wasn't due home until Monday. And he decided to go out and play golf so he went to the Pro Shop. He didn't have any clubs with him but he went and ren ted some clu bs and g at ready to pla,Y and wen t au t to the tee. And he was just getting ready to tee olf when the Pro came out and said, "Look." lie said, "We've got a single here'~ He said, "Would you like to play wit h someone else?" And he said, "Sure, I'd love to. I just hate playing by myself." So it ,turned out that this other person was a very beautiful girl. ,It happened that she was a real good golfer and they just had a wonderful time all the way around the course. Then finally they got to the eight een th hole and t'his man had about a twenty-foot putt. He said to this young lady, "Now we've had such a wonderful time today and I've enjoyed -11- it so much that if I sink this putt I'd 11ke to invite you to have dinner with me and we'll go to a show afterwards." So she said, "Well, that's just wonderful." Says, "I'd just really enjoy that." So he lined up his putt and looked it over real carefully, finally got over the putt and ran' it right in the back of the hole. It was a perfect putt. So the girl said--she had about a fifteen foot putt-- she said, "Now you've been so nice all day long and you've invl ted me out to dinner and to a show. If I sink this putt, after we've been to the dinner and the show we'll go up to my rOOm and we'll really have a good time." So he thought this was pretty good so he said, "That's real nice." So he helped her line up the putt. He looked at it from all different angles. He got behind the putt and to the side of it and he said, "You know, I've been a golfer for almost twenty years and if there was ever a gimme putt th is is it." 17. This guy came home from golf and his wife looked at him,- and she could tell he was in a terrible mood you know so she took him outside and she gave him some tea and she said, " Well, what's the matter Joe?" He said, "Well, I'll tell you. I don't think I'm ever going to play golf again. I went out there and I bogeyed the first hole, double bogeyed the second, I bogeyed the third hole. I got to the fourth hole and I~t the ball in the creek. Then on the fifth hole Harry had a heart attack." And his wife said, "Oh, no, that's hard ble." -------------------------- -12- "That wasn't so bad but from there on it was hit the ball, drag Harry, hit the ball, drag Harry." 18. These two Irishmen went out .one night and they were drink- ing and carousing and gambli::lg and fooling around with women and the whole business and they stayed out all night long doing th is and a bou t fi ve 0' clock they s tar ted to home' and one of them fel t qui te bad abou t the way he'd acted that night so he stopped off at the local parish to get sqt~ared away with the minister or rather the priest about it. And he walke~ in there and he said, "Father," he said, "I've been out drinkijg and carousing and throwing darts in the pub for money and I've committed adultery too and I feel bad about the way I've acted tonight and I have come to ask for absolution for my sins." And the Father said, "Well," he says, wJust the fact that you've come in shows me you really are sincere in what you say so I'm going to grant you absolution for the drinking and the gamb ling and too c arous ing and on the adultery if you'll tell me the lady's name. Was it Mrs. O'Callaghan?" He says, "No names Father. I don't feel it's my place to give names." He says, "Was~it Mrs. O'Riley?" He says, "No names father. If she fee Is bad enough abou t it sh e' 11 corne in and tell you herself. " He says, uh, "~las it Mrs. O'Kelley?" He says, "No names Father. I don't feel it's my responsibility. It's up to her if she feels th is way about it. " -13- So he says, "I can't grant you absolution for what you've done the n. II And he says, "Well I'm sorry." He says, "I tell you what you. can do. You go home and sleep it off and c orne back tomorrow and if you 'v~ c hanged your mind and want to give me the lady's name I'll get you squared away on all four counts." So the guy says, "Okay." So he leaves and his buddy is kinda' laying Qut there in the gutter anJ he taps him on the shoulder and the guy kinda' crawls to his feet and they start to stumble down the street. And his friend says, "Well, did you get squared away on every thing?" He says, uh, "No I didn't but we've got three great leads far toni.ght." 19. Why do ducks have flat feet? To stamp out forest fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? To stamp out burning ducks. 20. There >las this little colored boy and he went upstairs in his house and he put all this white cream on his face and he goes down and he says, "Hey .Ma, loolj:, I' s a white pehsun." And his mother just looked and said, "Lawsy me son, you go right upstairs and take off that stuff." So the guy's walking upstairs and he sees his father and says, "Look Pa, I's a white pehsun." His father says, "Lawsy me son, you go right up$~airs -14- and take off that stuff." So he's walking and he sa~'s, "Now I know why those white folks hates us. I've only been a white pehsun for five minutes an' already hates two of 'em.  A PDF transcript exists for this recording. Please contact an archivist for access.  Professor John Burrison founded the Atlanta Folklore Archive Project in 1967 at Georgia State University. He trained undergraduates and graduate students enrolled in his folklore curriculum to conduct oral history interviews. Students interviewed men, women, and children of various demographics in Georgia and across the southeast on crafts, storytelling, music, religion, rural life, and traditions.  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